Dear (your first name) (my future last name),
I'm writing you this list because I feel like it might be hard to get to know me, and I want to help you out. If I've already been your friend for a while, or you already read the stuff I write, you might have a better idea what I'm really like. Otherwise, if you've just met me and we're in the awkward stage of trying really hard to be sociable so everything works out - well, that's the hard part.
- You must be Lutheran, and of a synod that's very similar to mine. I'm not saying that people can't serendipitously find a mate across synodical lines. My dad and mom are an example - they turned out okay and made two exceptional children (just kidding...) Still, traditions in the case of music, the pastor's tone, how the church is run, etc. are central to worship life, and it's more beneficial to us both if they are shared. Typically the compromise with church attendance ends up in the husband's favor, and that's the hard truth.
- I tend to be the one that drags people to church. I want you to drag me to church! My favorite place to be is God's house, hearing His Word and partake of Holy Communion regularly with those I love. If you don't respect that, I must remember His day and keep it holy.
- My greatest fear is marrying a Christian who later falls away from the faith. While I understand each of us is responsible for the upkeep of our own faith (by the Holy Spirit's help), if one of us slips the other does as well. The burden is that of two people's eternal salvation, not just one.
- You have to be a musician - either know how to sing or play an instrument, and appreciate being around music. It's part of my lifestyle for good, and it's often challenging not having a family who understands. Then, I can share the closest part of my life with you.
- In my mind, there are usually ten different thoughts happening. Do I say this, or do I say the other thing? My awkwardness is the sound of them all trying to come out at once. (Writing usually solves it.)
- In groups, I have a difficult time acting like myself, because it's like a fight for conversational precedence. I never come up with anything cool to say that everyone else also wants to discuss. One-on-one time is how to find out what I'm really like.
- Food? Okay, I love food. I don't like eating too much, ever, but if my small size is an issue to people I will gladly eat a piece of chocolate cake and prove them wrong!
- Even though I may not have a lot to say, it doesn't mean I don't want to be around people. I almost always do - it feels better knowing that someone else is in the same room, if only to read a book. Not having others around scares me.
- Small talk is hard. When I have a casual conversation, I want to come away having learned something new. Sometimes it's confusing figuring out who actually cares and who doesn't.
- I'm sensitive, but always working hard to try not to show it. I only cry around those I trust.
- Adventures and things are the best. Seeing a random concert in a random city, going anywhere in a downpour, trying to make sushi, leaving surprise inside jokes at friends' houses, drive-in movies, nerf guns - oh wait, someone took the other nerf gun. Wonder who?
- Scrabble? You had better know what that is, my love, or you will soon. Also drinking coffee while playing Scrabble. Then again, you might have already approved of an espresso-bar wedding reception complete with Scrabble tiles and lots of class.
- I'm imperfect. Though there are lots of things I have yet to find out, I do know you have a sinful nature like I do. I will forgive you for it, because my sins are even greater in the Lord's eyes. I hope you will forgive me, too, and that we can absolve one another whenever it's needed. Christian comfort from God spoken by another is the greatest thing a marriage can offer.
That's all for now. I love you!
Me
Image from here.
